Common Challenges that Emerge for Caregivers

It is often in the midst of something that we recognize we need resources or feel alone in our feelings and thoughts. Caregiving is hard, especially when playing the role of parent, spouse, child, or friend. Wearing two hats can make us feel overwhelmed and even ashamed of how difficult it may be for us.

Here are 5 challenges that may emerge for caregivers:

1. Anticipatory Grief- This is the sadness and emptiness that can come while caring for someone who is still living. We may even find ourselves having dark thoughts. The idea of thinking them let alone sharing them causes guilt. Instead, we sit in the shame and quiet all the while putting on a brave face to try and help manage ourselves in an effort “push on”.

2. Fear of Knowledge- Giving ourselves permission to ask hard questions allows us to better walk alongside someone with an illness. Being informed helps make informed decisions. How we manage with the  uncertainty as well as how to balance realistic vs. false hope can be an integral part of the challenges that supporting someone with illness can face.

3. Communication Struggles-Conflicts may arise, and learning how to navigate challenging situations is important. Rather than avoiding them, embrace difficult conversations and make space for those moments.

4. Asking for relief- Finding support systems to help manage things like medicine, hygiene, and nutrition can be critical for a caregiver. Allow outsourcing when something feels out of your comfort zone. Ask for help and respect your own boundaries. Boundaries are an act of love and self-care.

5. Feeling the need to Control the situation- As humans, a response to anxiety or feeling overwhelmed can cause control to become the main coping mechanism. It temporarily can make us feel better, but caring for someone sick is often an on-going stressor and often with very little we can actually control. Working on the recognition between advocation vs. a need to manage our fears allows for us to be vulnerable in our experience.

Know that you are not alone in these struggles. Caring for a loved one is difficult. Take some time to take care of yourself and find avenues of support to help guide you through these challenges.